This community is for people who want to discuss being multiple. You can talk about how you are multiple, learn from others how they are multiple similarly or differently from you, get advice or examples that might benefit your system. All without worrying about whether you are doing it "right" or having to live up to anyone else's standards. We're here to discuss being multiple, not to get into endless and useless arguments.
The bullying has to stop, the snarking has to stop, and the dropping of little innocent-seeming phrases that are really meant to put others on the defensive and cause lengthy and fruitless argument. All of that, out.
If you can't discuss multiplicity -- be it natural multiplicity, otherkin, soulbonding/fictives, MPD/DID, whatever -- in a courteous, civilized manner, you will be banned. God knows I don't like to be a hard ass about this stuff, but this has gone far enough.
I'm getting complaints from people who simply don't feel they can write about their experiences in this community. My guess is that there are plenty of others who have left quietly because they don't feel they belong in the community as it is now.
I am meeting with both the Fenners and Amorpha this evening to discuss exactly who, what and how.
So, the past few days don't seem to have happened. What I mean by this is that I have no memory of what happened in the past few days, but I have the knowledge of it, though it is hard to access. I suppose this is a step up from where I was in high school when I would just black out after a switching headache and not have any access to the knowledge at all, but since for the past few years we've been mostly co-conscious, it seems really weird. Also, we're switching often now, instead of the smooth transition of fronting, we're getting headaches in between switches, and I even think in the past few days there has been little co-fronting at all, just one of us at a time. Also, at times when trying to access the knowledge of what was going on when others were out, we get headaches. I'm considering writing a journal so the others can know whats happened without having to worry about it.
Oh yeah, also, Hi, I'm Yuuki, nice to meetcha.
- Mood:
sleepy - Music:Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni
So I've rarely fronted until last night, typically we have either Sora or Yuuki fronting, but most of the time they are both co-fronting. Our numbers have varied over the years, but the current known to be here population is Me, Sora, Yuuki, and ???. One of the things that happened to day actually was the first encounter with ???, who is not named yet, as we haven't had much communication.
I doubt Yuuki will be posting any time soon, as they* had a panic attack recently and is still recovering, but Sora will probably post soon as they seem to be fine.
Anyways, this post is intended as an introduction post for our system, and I have no clue what else to say, so... Good Morning.
*"They" is being used here in the singular form in reference to the lack of gender, which is slightly more described in our journal.
- Mood:
sleepy
I do think that I would have been better off, having gotten the information out of books. But I don't know, that's water under the bridge. Everyone who knows me, knows I feel therapy did me a great deal of harm.
But anyway. The one thing it did give me, was the notion that *just maybe* my memories were of things that had really happened, and not just a lot of evil sinfulness that I was making up because the devil had ahold of me....and yadda yadda, I'm sure you've heard the rest of *that* evangelical bullsh******t.
Later, when my stepdad was elderly and diabetic and in my mom's care, I saw some things re-enacted, and I knew for absolutely sure that no, I hadn't made it up or exaggerated it.
Meanwhile, though, I do think that the thought of 'maybe I'm not lying', kept me from suicide long enough to get to that point.
I know this sounds rather along the 'disordered' rather than 'empowered' line of thought....and what I would say to that, is that I think trauma-multis have every bit as much right to empower ourselves, as....well, anyone else. I would compare it to losing one's hearing in adulthood, and joining the deaf community as a fully empowered and whole person. (And I do know there are some rifts in the deaf community, just like there are in the multiple community. I'm just sayin', I feel like those rifts are pretty useless.)
-Sean
EDIT: Look, the therapist comment was just to say that I'm not getting any help from him. He does NOT affect the fact that I don't know whether I'm just dissociating or if they're real people, and this question would have probably been asked with or without him. I have a lot of issues to deal with, and I am not seeing him for multiplicity, it only comes up because I told him about it once and he asks about it if we run out of other things to talk about. He's even told me that it's okay if I don't believe him. His stance is that they are dissociation, not people, and that there is a reason why they are there, and that I need to ask them until they give me an answer other than "well, why are *you* here?" I disagree with him about the question, but I do not know what to think about whether they're dissociation-induced or real people. Some days I believe they're real, some days not. Today, for example, I do believe they are real and separate people and that I'm not even the first one who was here. Two days ago, I believed we were all the same person and that I was dissociating sometimes, and sometimes "I" even thought that while talking to others or while being someone else.
I appreciate all your comments, I really do, just please leave my therapist out of it, because he has very little to do with this question.
Funny part of the time, thought-provoking all the time. (If it's not, then I'm doing something wrong.)
Pyraxis found the link for me, and it's
http://opinionsimnotentitledto.blog
If anyone would like to give it a look-see, there it is.
Basically, the fact that I had 80+ soulbonds/others in my head was a strain on my emotions. As in he thinks it's why I had a breakdown. Nathan said that he was surprised that I had held on for so long. Now, Nathan is also a multiple. And he had the same problem that I did.
So yesterday evening-after the Arceus movie where besides his voice being dumb I enjoyed it-I sent about...*thinks* 16 or 17 to Jordan's mind to live there and sent 5 to Melissa's mind to live there. :3 I'm keeping 38...*notices that all but two of her others are in her mind and only 2 went to Jordan's mind* Huh. And then the rest...(like 21 or so...)...I'm...*thinks of how to put it* I'm reabsorbing them? They'll kind of...become a part of me...I...guess....
I didn't originally want to do it, but all my others and soulbonds kind of agreed that the fact that there were so many of them was hurting me emotionally/mentally and the ones that are going to be absorbed understand and don't really mind...
Which I don't get. But...it won't be painful for them or anything...really, the ones I'm reabsorbing are soulbonds from, like, watching a movie or a random TV show.
...I know that there are multiples that have a TON of people in their minds and function fine, but the way I form bonds with my others/soulbonds is so that I can really only have a certain number before it starts to affect me negatively. Which...well...I was getting to be very emotionally unstable. Which is bad.
....Yeah. So...that's really it. *hugs you guys* ...Anyway, comment if you can/want...:3
-Mary of the Black Sunflower Collection (which is...nearly/at least 60 O.o)
( cut for spoilers )
I think it was the second commercial and the familiar voice of the spokesman for Central Bank, a local bank headquartered here in Jefferson City, Missouri.
He said something like this(imagine it being spoken in a slightly "down home" accent):
"Hello again folks! From time to time we here at Central Bank like to dig into the mailbag and see what our customers are saying, and recently we got this letter: 'Hi, my name's Steve and I have multiple personalities! We were wanting to know if its possible to set up a bank account for each one of us so we can manage our finances better?'
"Well Steve here at Central Bank we offer free checking services for all your needs(he talks about the checking features for a moment). So, whether you want separate accounts for bills and for recreation, or if you want an account for Stan, Samuel, Shirley, and James, remember, at Central Bank, we can take care of you!"
I was floored because I was expecting some kind of "punch-line" or some sort of weird intonation that made it clear that it was all just "cleverness" in advertising. But instead he finished it matter-of-factly and the whole thing felt very oddly like they had seriously had that happen and thought it made a good selling point for their free checking!
It is sort of part of a series of good simple commercials about how they can solve even somewhat obscure banking issues and I realize it likely was just a clever idea someone in marketing came up with, but the way it was presented and done made me extremely happy that there was nothing about the commercial that could really be considered prejudicial and also that we bank with them! :D
Tomorrow I think I am going to send them an email telling them how much we appreciate how cool they were to make a commercial like that and see if we can get an mp3 of it or something to share on here. I dunno what they'll say but maybe they'll appreciate the free advertising?
Heh. Anyway, thought some of you would appreciate an example of even a simple commercial that didn't show us in a negative or even "freakish" light... but rather just like any other group of customers :)
~Kent for Puzzles
- Mood:
excited - Music:crowded house ~ don't dream its over